Daily Tarot: 5 of Swords

Where do we try to be right instead of trying to understand? Where do we treat interactions as something to win at? Where do we avoid our tender feelings by being spiky with others?
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Something I’ve been working on lately is allowing my feelings, even when they’re so-called “negative” emotions like fear, anger, jealousy. I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to avoid being wrong or feeling vulnerable, and that is a pretty exhausting way to live. There’s no right or wrong way to feel, ever. Discomfort does not mean you did something “wrong” or that there’s another way you should feel. You’re not going to ever be happy all the time. Even too much of what we think we want will end up being uncomfortable.
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In tarot, the 5s mark a contraction, where everything feels uncomfortable before an expansion. And treating the discomfort like a hurdle to jump to get somewhere else is another another way we avoid being present with it. So if you’re feeling this card, give yourself permission to be in the contraction without fighting it. Just see where it brings you, let yourself be soft.
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In the 5 of Swords, you don’t want to be the smug asshole up here at the front collecting his winnings (too many swords to even use) and gloating. Sure you won, but now you’re alone, and you’re going to have to feel whatever you were trying to numb out by fighting in the first place.
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In this card, you want to be the ones crying over there by the water, allowing your feelings. You tried your best, it didn’t work out, you’re grieving that in order to move on. And you’re not too stubborn to accept help.
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Featuring the best breakup/disappointment album ever, Cloudland. It’s on YouTube if you want to listen to it.